Stop trying to be perfect. Sioux Falls Boudoir
Hey friend! I am coming at you a bit differently today. If you're not over in the FACEBOOK group, you can join to see me on video about this. But the message feels important so I am posting it here forever.
How many of you avoid doing something because you think that you cannot do it perfectly?
I’m raising my hand because I am totally guilty of this. 👋
I was talking to a friend yesterday and I was explaining to her how I wanted to do this thing but I couldn't bring myself to do it .
Then she asked me a series of questions that really made me think about that thing.
What's the worst thing that could happen to you?
Why do you want to do this?
What are you missing out on from not doing it?
Through the course of the conversation I realized it was because I was afraid of not doing it perfectly.
Now I can totally trace back where this comes from as a child I had some oldest child perfectionist tendencies that definitely come out in my work life and in my home life. But based on all the women that I talk to everyday I think that's really common.
But then my friend asked me... What does perfect mean? What does that look like for you?
Do you know what perfect means? Who decides that? It’s just an opinion.
Perfection is just someone’s thoughts about something. It’s not a fact.
For myself I am extremely hard on myself whether it's photographing a client or parenting or cleaning my house or some home project I'm always trying to make perfect but usually just cause myself a whole lot of stress when in reality it's fine. We ate a nourishing meal. My kids are pretty cool humans. My house is homey. Is it perfect, no. And it does’t have to be.
Everyday I get phone calls or emails from women or comments in the group and they really want to do a session but want to lose weight first or they were hoping to work out more first or whatever typically falls in those lines. That magazine version of a “perfect woman.” But in reality, that’s all a lie. Even the “perfect” women are airbrushed beyond reality. Media women are not real women.
Then ask yourself, at what point are you perfect? When will you be good enough?
Instead of doing this thing, this really empowering thing because you're not perfect yet you missed out on all the opportunity of learning to love yourself the way that you are right now and seeing yourself. And you get to see yourself through the eyes of other people.
And that’s really powerful.
If you're hesitating to do a session with me, or if you are hesitating to do anything else in your life because you feel like you can't do it perfectly or you're not good enough right now to do that thing, I want you to take a minute and step towards the hard thing.
Ask yourself this question, “What could bring me closer to the thing I want to do?” Your opinion of what is imperfect is somebody else's idea of perfection.
Your body right now is somebody else's goal body.
You never need to stop trying to be better, but stop trying to be so perfect that you won't even take the step towards the next amazing thing in your life because it’s not yet perfect.
If you have a business that you're wanting to start but you keep putting off because you think it's not ready, put it out to the world.
If you do you have an idea for a project in your home but you're afraid that it won't be perfect, go buy the paint. If you want to do a boudoir session, but think you need to fix something about yourself, how much fixing will be enough for you? You really are so fabulous right now.
Take the step toward the hard thing. It doesn’t have to be perfect, and don’t hold yourself back waiting for it to be perfect. In the words of Zig Ziglar - You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.
XO, Shalista