From Miss E

I was toying with the idea of a boudior shoot as a gift to my husband. However, talking with Shalista over the phone I realized that I was not comfortable at all in my post-baby body and kind of resented it. Just the conversation with Shalista started a healing process with myself I didn't know I needed. Not to be self-centered but I am at the heaviest I have ever been in my entire life, my boobs aren't nice and perky anymore, I have a scar from an emergency c-section, and my thighs touch and rub and I have never had that before.

Going through college I had a tough bought of anxiety/depression/and body dysmorphia. At one point I was barely 100 pounds then I started getting help and putting healthy weight on. However, it was alarming to me the weight I was putting on because of society standards or negative connotations that weight gain is bad. Battling through that I ended up settling at about 130 pounds. Then I started coaching gymnastics and participating with the girls and put another 20 pounds of muscle on and looked extremely toned and fit and was so happy in general and I loved the way my body looked and it felt great. Then my husband and I finally got pregnant with our daughter and I was sicker than dog just about everyday of pregnancy and barely got out bed most days. After having our daughter I was like I can finally workout again and the baby weight will fall off no problem. 8 months post partum I still have the baby weight, love handles, and saggy boobs. To be honest I really struggled to look at myself in the mirror.

After talking with Shalista and realizing at how unhappy I was with my body but what my body has gone through over the past year and half is quite incredible and that was healing in itself. After that realization I decided I really wanted to celebrate my body instead of being ashamed of it.

Preparing for the shoot I was extremely excited to get glammed up because I never wear make-up and am incompetent at it. I was excited picking out the outfits to wear or not wear for the session. I was also nervous about posing in front of a mostly stranger almost nude for the first time. As mentioned before I was still nervous about what my body would look like even though I had started loving it again. After the shoot, I felt amazing, powerful, a sex goddess. I finally understood what my husband kept telling me. I am sexy as hell. If you ever thought about doing a boudior shoot, this is your sign to do it. Shalista took the time to get to know me before we started shooting, she gave me step-by-step posing instructions. She could also sense when I needed a break and would talk to me for a couple minutes. Nothing ever felt rushed or on a time line. Also, I did take full nudes and I never felt nude or like I was wearing skimpy outfits in front of her.

After the shoot, I felt amazing, powerful, a sex goddess. I finally understood what my husband kept telling me. I am sexy as hell.

What made you decide to hire me as your photographer?: I had initially called Shalista to talk to her a little bit about doing a boudior shoot as a gift for my husband. However, during the phone call talking to her about my insecurities and hesitancy it made me realize I was very insecure in my post-baby body. Shalista made me already feed to comfortable and confident talking through the session and what to expect that I decided to trust her with my boudior session.

What made you decide to do a boudoir session? Describe how to came to that decision!: I was toying with the idea of a boudior shoot as a gift to my husband. However, talking with Shalista over the phone I realized that I was not comfortable at all in my post-baby body and kind of resented it. Just the conversation with Shalista started a healing process with myself I didn't know I needed. Not to be self-centered but I am at the heaviest I have ever been in my entire life, my boobs aren't nice and perky anymore, I have a scar from an emergency c-section, and my thighs touch and rub and I have never had that before. Going through college I had a tough bought of anxiety/depression/and body dysmorphia. At one point I was barely 100 pounds then I started getting help and putting healthy weight on. However, it was alarming to me the weight I was putting on because of society standards or negative connotations that weight gain is bad. Battling through that I ended up settling at about 130 pounds. Then I started coaching gymnastics and participating with the girls and put another 20 pounds of muscle on and looked extremely toned and fit and was so happy in general and I loved the way my body looked and it felt great. Then my husband and I finally got pregnant with our daughter and I was sicker than dog just about everyday of pregnancy and barely got out bed most days. After having our daughter I was like I can finally workout again and the baby weight will fall off no problem. 8 months post partum I still have the baby weight, love handles, and saggy boobs. To be honest I really struggled to look at myself in the mirror. After talking with Shalista and realizing at how unhappy I was with my body but what my body has gone through over the past year and half is quite incredible and that was healing in itself. After that realization I decided I really wanted to celebrate my body instead of being ashamed of it.

How were you feeling before your shoot? Any thoughts going through your head?: I was extremely excited to get glammed up because I never wear make-up and am incompetent at it. I was excited picking out the outfits to wear or not wear for the session. I was also nervous about posing in front of stranger almost nude for the first time. As mentioned before I was still nervous about what my body would look like even though I had started loving it again.

Afterwards how did you feel?: After the shoot, I felt amazing, powerful, a sex goddess. I finally understood what my husband kept telling me. I am sexy as hell.